In our previous Article the Uniqueness of Singleness. Part one we addressed some single thoughts about marriage. below are the concluding parts of it.
Divorce is not the worst part of sins. Listen if your marriage didn’t work you are not going to hell don’t let anyone put any guilt on you the bible never said that divorce is the worst sin if you have a failed situation in marriage God’s grace is sufficient for you and cleanse you from the mistake. The solution to divorce is not a second marriage; it’s a second chance to get knowledge.
1peter 3:7 In the same way husbands must live with your wives with the proper understanding that they are more delicate than you. Treat them with respect, because they also will receive, together with you, God’s gift of life. Do this so that nothing will interfere with your prayers. As a man, you need special knowledge to live with a woman, and as a woman, you need a degree of tolerance to live with a man because some men are crazy.
Steps to avoid divorce.
- Divorce is impossible without marriage. In other words, you can’t get a divorce without marriage oooh… everybody I have counseled who have been through a divorce always says if I had known I wouldn’t have gotten married.
- Marriage is impossible without an individual.
- Marriage is a prerequisite for divorce. So if you don’t want to get a divorce, you have to focus on marriage first if you don’t want to get married you have to single focus on the individual first.
- Singleness is the prerequisite for marriage. That is to say, that singleness determines the quality of your marriage and the quality of your marriage determines if you will experience divorce, which means your marriage is only as good as your singleness. Divorce is predictable; the quality of your single life determines it all. You bring into your marriage what you are as a single person (if you are stupid as a single person you will be silly in your marriage no miracle happens at the alter).
- Finally, the omelet principle. Omelets are only as good as the egg it was made from. If Jude is a good egg and he joins himself in marriage with Eva who happens to be a rotten egg, the marriage will end in divorce because dad eggs stink more than good eggs. If they don’t change to get you, they will never change to keep you. That is to say, once you make an omelet you cant get your egg back again, once you are married you can never get your singleness still. So my concussion is that eggs are more important than omelets.
Most of the people today in our society don’t have singleness problem but being single. Relationships get better the more single you become this is a myth. Singleness is a state to be pursued, not avoided. To be single is supposed to be the goal of every married person, there is a difference between been unmarried and been single. Unmarried is a state while singleness is a disposition. Singleness is God’s original plan.
Matthew 19 3 Some Pharisees came to him and tried to trap him by asking, “Does our Law allow a man to divorce his wife for whatever reason he wishes?”
4 Jesus answered, “Haven’t you read the scripture that says that in the beginning, the Creator made people male and female? 5 This is Jesus teaching telling them God in the beginning never crated a married couple but a male and a female.
And Adam said, ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and unite with his wife, and the two will become one.’ 6 So they are no longer two, but one. No human being must separate, then, what God has joined together.”
Jesus said the reason why many marriages fail is that you have never been in the beginning states, i.e. you’ve never been a full male or a full female. This means the reason you had a divorce was that you were never single. Many women today are married to a man who doesn’t have the quality of Adam, and if you study Adam he had the following qualities
Adam never needed a mate he was busy working in the bible naming the animals and plants in the garden, tilling the soil, and cultivating it.
Genesis 2 15 Then the Lord God placed the man in the Garden of Eden to cultivate it and guard it. First command work(cultivate and guard it) you don’t need a woman to be a real full man you need a job first. You are still in college or just finished with the college you don’t even have a job yet or money to take care of yourself, and you are fooling around with a girl. The first command is work if you aren’t working you don’t deserve to be with any woman and as a woman never you accept any man who isn’t working yet rather encourages him to get a job first. Then the Lord God placed the man in the Garden of Eden. What is the meaning of Eden? Eden means God’s presence, so on a more serious note you don’t need a job first for a healthy relationship or marriage, you need to be in God’s presence first. The next commands guard the garden to protect it from any harm; he ordered him to cultivate, which means to develop everything around. And the fifth thing God gave the man was to keep my commandment, i.e. don’t touch the tree in the middle. Which means before a man is qualified for any healthy relationship or marriage he must keep these five commands
- He must be in Gods presence
- He must be working
- He should know the words of God
- He should be able to cultivate you
- He should be able to protect you if he can’t protect you don’t waste your time with him.
If he can’t meet the above demands, he deserves to be alone. A lot of ladies keep asking the wrong question to the guy do you love me?. When choosing a mate, the first question should be, are you in God’s presence? Secondly, are you working?, thirdly do you know the word of God? Believe me, this question will make him leave your house, fourthly can you cultivate me? And finally, can you protect me?.
Adam didn’t know he needed to marry God’s interrupted him to get him married. Here is the principle until you don’t need to be married you are not yet ready for marriage, if you can’t wait to be married you are dangerous I’m talking about the ladies now stop being desperate for marriage. Adam never told God he needed a woman God saw he needed a helpmate and gave him Eve. A lot of women out there are like a leach when you ask them what do you have to offer you will get a funny response as I love you. What are you bringing to the table? I will love him. This is wrong until you are independent as a woman you don’t deserve to live with any man. You are supposed to be a helper, not a liability of burden.
Finally, It is okay to be single, but it is not okay to be alone. God never said it’s not good for a man to be single. He said it’s not good for a man to be alone. Alone is not the same as single; singleness is the most important state of everyone’s life for that was the original plan for God. Your marriage is as good as your singleness, so develop yourself to become an asset to your marriage.
Singleness means to be truly separate, unique, and whole. This means you don’t need people around you to be happy because you are unique, separate, and whole from others. Separate means to be different from everyone else. Unique means that you possess something that no one else has. And Whole means you don’t need anything from anybody to feel complete.
The end……
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